Once You Break The Trauma Bond You Realize This About The Narcissists

It will be hard to fathom in the beginning, but it all comes to light in the end.

Chris Freyler
3 min readSep 16


Photo by Pro Church Media on Unsplash

I spent years hoping, believing, wishing, trying, dying, trying to force someone to love me who didn’t. I watched time and time again as she ran off with different men with ease. It was almost like I never existed. From an outsider looking in I didn’t.

I couldn’t understand how one day a person could act madly in love only to run off with a stranger the next day to have sex. It really did boggle my mind. The emotional hell I put myself through is unexplainable. I’ve said it before and I will say it again, “you have to live it to understand it.”

The grip these relationships create with a traumatized person is unreal. If you don’t figure out quickly why you are attached to such an abusive asshole you have some long miserable days ahead my friend. It’s no easy feat breaking the trauma bond, and really seeing the person behind the curtain for who they really are.

I am hear to tell you some good, and not so good news. For those that are new to this form of abuse and, are in the midst of hell still it might hurt a little. But once you break the trauma bond you will feel the “indifference” the Narcissists feels for you as I write this.

I’ve read time and time again when the trauma bond breaks you will know, it’s a feeling of indifference. I’m telling you, it couldn’t be stated any better. It actually gives me a Narcissistic perspective on how they feel about relationships in general.

They really don’t give a shit about you, NONE. They care how you make them feel, that’s it. Once you don’t benefit them any more you are nothing, not even a memory. As long as you are a slave to their needs you are of benefit.

The feeling I’m having at this moment is complete indifference. It’s like she never existed, but did. It’s so difficult to explain. I don’t really care what happens to her. Not that I want something bad to happen, but I don’t want anything good either. I flat out don’t give a fuck. It’s a beautiful thing I tell you.

I went to war with myself for a solid 2–3 years of personal hell chasing someone who…



Chris Freyler

Mistake Maker Extraordinaire .Writing from a place I don’t understand at times. I write to help myself, in return hope it helps you. Just another Quora guy.