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What My Marriage Taught me About The Devil
In my demise, awareness was found, not sought.
I wish I never found awareness. I wish I’d stayed in my clueless, meaningless, loveless marriage of just going through the motions of society, “faking” it.
That was life
My ex wife did her thing, I did mine. Sex once a month, if that, dinner together once a month, a shallow “hello” as we passed in the evening, or morning, followed by a lot of “what if’s.”
Life was easier back then. Blaming people, places, things and not looking at myself. Distracting, escaping, and running from what I needed to face, until it happened.
The divorce
Ever since that cool fall day in 2015 nothing has been the same. It was supposed to get easier after I rid myself of the ole’ “ball and chain.” But the other two I found after her put my life into a perspective I never dreamed was possible, and not in a good way.
My marriage was shit, I’m not going to lie. The whole relationship was, but what did I know? She was my first girlfriend, my first love, and my first time really doubting myself. I didn’t want to date her at 20 years old, but I felt I had too.
