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When “Quitting” Life Seems Like a You Best Course of Action
At 47, it seems impossible to put the pieces back together that were never complete to begin with.
I’ve been anxious, or I guess you could say I’ve been unsettled for the last 6 months. I’m not sure what feelings are real or what feelings I am actually experiencing. I have zero motivation for anything. I feel like I am faking a passion for creativity in writing. Why can I be more authentic in my writings than in real life? Why do I hide behind a keyboard?
Distractions; and they love company
For years I would drink to mask these feelings, I guess. But I don’t know if these feelings existed before I quit using my distraction of choice, booze, to an extent. I’ve also chosen to focus on myself and not other people. It’s just me now.
Maybe this is all part of the process at 6 months into this shift in life. Everything I knew and everything of comfort for the old me I need to let go. And it’s safe to say I don’t like this “new” me. Not that I cared for the old me either.
It’s almost like I never knew who I was, what I am, or doing. I don’t know what I enjoy any more other than living a life full of distraction. I lived a life of escape so much the person that I…
