Why Your Childhood is The Blueprint For Your Future
From your home life to elementary school, it all has a impact.
I learned about not trusting people at home, that eventually carried over into school, and life. The biggest thing I learned at home is to not trust myself.
I’m just now coming to grips with CPTSD, and it’s not for the faint of heart. Nor is it an excuse for shitty behaviors, but it plays part in the background.
One to six years old taught me all about fear, instability, emotional deregulation, struggle, and failure. It’s here I took these little nuggets of wisdom to elementary school.
School is where the real tormented started
Insecure, abused kids aren’t welcome here. The same insecure, and abused kids like to pick on the other “type” of abused. Not sure why I picked the route I did, I was never the type to bully anyone. I just wanted to fit in.
But my insecurities wouldn’t let me “fit” in. They made me an isolated, insecure little twit. Until I found the weight room at 17 years old.
Here is were I felt a little relief, but it didn’t last long. Then I tried a relationship. Yep, the first one I married. That didn’t do it either.
